“Where do you see God’s love in all this anger?” “God’s not there. If God loves me when I behave badly, then I’ll never change.” But then I remembered loving my nephew in the midst of a tantrum. Could that apply to me?
And finding it where I hadn’t expected. With my Dad.
It is only when I am fully me and explore and exercise my passions and truth that I can do whatever it is that I am meant to do with this life.
Yet I still struggle with my belief that I’m not supposed to have it. So I returned to the source – Jesus and the Buddha to find out what they really had to teach me.
In teaching my nephew to swim, he would often struggle no matter how much I told him to lay back and trust me. I do the same in my life. But each time I trust the voice inside I find myself floating.
Having faith does not mean having all the answers. I need only to keep aiming toward the divine and trusting in what feels right, even when it doesn’t make sense, even when it seems contrary to how I thought I was “supposed” to live, and even when it’s scary because I can’t see what’s ahead.
My confession is not that I feel shame about being “white,” which I do, because that’s pretty normal in my social circle. Rather, it relates to my hurt when I’m called a racist.
Suicide will not be prevented by trivializing posts telling people they are loved and with hotline numbers. Here’s my experience both as someone who has loved those who have taken their lives and as someone who’s considered it.
Within a month I caught two thieves and followed them both. One got away. One I talked to and bought him lunch. I learned from them to listen to my gut and be who I am not who I think I’m supposed to be.
I often put off thank you cards as a burden, but discovered as I wrote them following my brother’s death, they acted as a ritual to release grief by evoking memories of him and friends who loved us.
How I stop feeling bad about just being me.